The other night, after a very long day, I found myself on the London Underground. I was freezing, exhausted, emotional, on the verge of tears, angry with myself and with how things had panned out. You know when you have something in your diary and you imagine this thing and create it in your head and think that that's how the thing will happen in real life, and then it doesn't happen at all like that and you're left feeling dejected and crumpled and upset? Well. That had happened.
Anyway, I was on the Tube, and it was speed-rattling along, and I was trying not to look at the people sitting opposite me, and feeling all sorry for myself and cut up. But then the sound of the Tube as it tunnelled through its London tunnels just took me from me, from my shitty evening, from my aching freezing body.
The Underground has a loud noise, deep and rushing, like wind and screaming. Obviously I have been on a Tube before, but I've never really found comfort in its sound until this moment the other night. It just sounded so soothing. In its own way, it's painful, inescapable, vicious, and I just felt soothed and calmed by it. So I just focussed in on the sound, and while it lasted I felt so much better, it was beautiful.
The closest thing I can think of to compare with this noise and its cathartic effect is Merzbow. Sheered back, aggressive forms that don't really take on solid shapes but pulse on and tunnel through your brain, and it feels like slow and fast all at once, and it's weird and right, and all kinds of different things to different people.
So here is some Merzbow.